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Monday, October 26, 2009

Yummy Treat!


  Now , as every woman knows , men have invented every possible way of relieving the dreaded PMS . Nobody wants their beloved to turn into a moody , toaster-tossing , sobbing wreck of pain .
Advil , Tylenol , and Aleve were instantly targeted at the afflicted . Back in the day , they even had chocolate-coated Aspirin listed among the "famous" doctor's remedies sold at every druggist around . In days of olde , even Hardware Stores stocked such potions giving menfolk one-stop shopping  - tools for the boys and stuff to keep the old lady from using the tools on the fella . WIN.

Despite all of the wonderfully man-made concoctions , woman discovered the TRUE cure to all that ails - the FROZEN DESSERT . Be it Ben & Jerry's , Haagen-Dazs , a fancy sorbet , or even Tofutti ; there are as many flavours as there are states of intrauterine disturbance . And women DO buy up all of this cold , creamy spoonfed foodgasm they can get whenever a heinous attack of the blues or preggo insanity should surface .
And all has been well and good in the frozen land inhabited by newly-sedate domestic goddesses  so the Japanese , as industrious as they are , have come up with their submission to the Premenstual Hall of WTF.

Basahi Ice . Sounds pleasant - now what is it ?!

Well , it is a frozen confection with mouthwatering chunks of ...

RAW HORSEMEAT  !!!

I mean , bun-in-oven afflicted mamas might quip that they are so hungry they could eat a horse , but only the serious Japanese could believe this to be fact . I mean it's uncooked Mr . Ed for fuck sakes! At least cook the poor carcass before ...nevermind - the idea is still revolting. This might be why there's some ancient rule about not mixing meat and dairy .
TOKYO HAS HIJACKED PMS AND HELD IT FOR THE HEAD OF ED!

OKAY , society that has no idea of who women are , leave OUR food the fuck alone . Seriously.
Or I might cry.
Worse.
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I will pay any of you $50 if you can find any of this stuff and eat it on webcam

2 comments:

  1. Mika...this is weirder than the meat business cards,lol. I hate to stereotype, but is there nothing that the Japanese won't eat? I mean seriously..ack...wretch

    ReplyDelete

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