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Tuesday, July 21, 2009

A Few Words About Botox

Does this lady look 76 years old on the outside to you? Me neither . Now we all know that this is not a nutaural look - among her vast array of "self-improvement" procedures , miss Joan is a big fan of this Botox shit , as are millions of other people who think that removing your facial expressions equals youthful .
So , let's explore exactly what Botox is .
Botox is the trade name for Clostridium Botulinum - yes , kids , it is the most terrifying neurotoxin ON THE PLANET . 1 TEASPOON of this stuff is toxic enough to kill 1.2 BILLION people , but someone decided that since it is a paralytic , that it might be helpful for treating debilitating spastic conditions . Sounds good so far , until some geniuses also figured out that the same effect APPEARS to temporarily get rid of pesky wrinkles and millions of insecure people have lined up to get injections of something so toxic that every batch is tested on animals - are you listening PeTA? Yup , avowed PeTA supporters like Joanie here , Kim Cattrall , simon Cowell and others are injecting this stuff in their faces because , you know , what's a few million mice to interfere with their natural ability to BLINK?!
This stuff is inherently dangerous - if administered by an untrained person as is often done at socialite parties , the toxin can paralyze other things - like your heart or lungs for example . There's even evidence that minute amounts of even "correctly" administered Botulin can disrupt the neurotransmitters in the brain . Last year , Health Canada even warned doctors about serious and potentially fatal consequences of its use . Now , I'm sure most of us remember a time where smoking was considered fairly harmless and our mothers may have even smoked or drank when pregnant because people were unaware of the consequences - is Botox the same thing? With people dying during elective procedures , it seems safer to inject something into a muscle instead of knock someone out and cut-and-paste , but is it REALLY safe? And why are people lining up to have the most dangerous protein in the Universe injected and then going back for repeats of one of the most cruelly-produced "products" out there ? If fur and all of the other cruel industries are spotlighted , why not this one?
The stupidity of people never ceases to amaze me . But at least one of the effects of Botox is you have a semi-premanent retarded look on your mug to warn others of your vanity and general brainlessness . Oh and lady , your face looks like someone pulled a condom over a softball.

1 comment:

  1. I really love it when you go all "on_fire" about stuff like this. You make me a more intelligent and socially aware person and that my friend is no small feat!! Keep em' coming and by the way, the visual of a condom being pulled over a softball was priceless! Truly made me laugh out loud :)


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