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Sunday, July 26, 2009

I Was Gonna Leave Jon Gosselin Alone ...

And then he paraded himself in layer-upon-layer of acidhead vomit .
This dude has traded in his shitty neglectful "parenting" style for large amounts of money and the ugliest and most retarded stable of groupies EVER . I mean PHIL SPECTOR had better ones , but , oh yeah Spector had some TALENT before his douchebag factor got too huge and did him (and at least one unfortunate lady) in .
And now some idiots are actually paying this dingo to look even douchier with his Motorola Bluedouche headset and layers of Christian Audiger's "Because Calling It Ed Hardy Makes It Sound So Much Cooler" latest PCP-induced hallucination .
Thank God that he's such a self-involved and distant "parent" , since his offspring don't have to breathe in the intoxicating douche stench that I imagine smells like a combination of ass sweat , axe , menthol cigarettes , and cheap ladies cologne .
Well , at the very least , he's at least warning anyone over 25 of his voluntary human billboard retardation . Maybe he's doing us all a favour by taking all the potential pity-fucks off of the market . Never thought about it that way . Interesting .

There are rare instances when being an absent father might just be a good thing . I'm thinking this may be one of those.


  1. Loser loser loser loser

  2. im going to do a shot of cheap ladies cologne for every time you said douche. i wouldnt f*ck him with perez's mangina

  3. The more I see of this Ed Hardy wearing asshat, the more I get why Kate seems like such a witch.I've never watched the show,but I do wonder how her personality will change with him gone..maybe she and those poor children will be happier.

  4. I have to laugh how he dresses so much differently since he split from the family - and not in a good way! Sometimes its better all around if one of the parents leave. Its probably much easier on the kids than to be subjected to all the fighting and such. He's definitely a walking billboard wearing Ed Hardy, excuse me, Christian Audigers, shirts. I read the other day that for their show, the producers got rid of the love seat that they use to sit in and just have a single chair--big changes going on in that show! LOL

  5. Well I'm at a disadvantage here, every time I hear the theme music for entertainment tonight it's about as reviling as my distant memories of phone ringers. My thumb usually skates automatically over the remote to change the channel. and since the sight of that fucktard Ben Mulroney usually has the same effect as phones, owing to the close resemblance to his lowlife sheister father I have to admit I have no fucking clue who this guy is. The name vaguely sounds like I have heard it before, but by appearances, I would peg him more for a hot dog vendor, or one of those hangabouts you see sitting on the hooded of a modded out honda civic with a tail pipe that looks like a recycled time capsule.


Enjoy yourself, it's later than you think