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Monday, October 11, 2010

The Heterosexual Questionnaire



 This questionnaire was invented in the early 70's to put people in the shoes of a gay person , but is also kind of fun in its own right . Check it out and you can post your replies. Also feel free to post this in your own blog, Myspace, crackbook, etc. as it is intentionally in the public domain.

1. What do you think caused your heterosexuality?

2. When and where did you decide you were a heterosexual?

3. Is it possible this is just a phase and you will out grow it?

4. Is it possible that your sexual orientation has stemmed from a neurotic fear of others of the same sex?

5. Do your parents know you are straight? Do your friends know- how did they react?

6. If you have never slept with a person of the same sex, is it just possible that all you need is a good gay lover?

7. Why do you insist on flaunting your heterosexuality... can’t you just be who you are and keep it quiet?

8. Why do heterosexuals place so much emphasis on sex?

9. Why do heterosexuals try to recruit others into this lifestyle?

10. A disproportionate majority of child molesters are heterosexual... Do you consider it safe to expose children to heterosexual teachers?

11. Just what do men and women do in bed together? How can they truly know how to please each other, being so anatomically different?

12. With all the societal support marriage receives, the divorce rate is spiraling. Why are there so few stable relationships among heterosexuals?

13. How can you become a whole person if you limit yourself to compulsive, exclusive heterosexuality?

14. Considering the menace of overpopulation how could the human race survive if everyone were heterosexual?

15. Could you trust a heterosexual therapist to be objective? Don't you feel that he or she might be inclined to influence you in the direction of his or her leanings?

16. There seem to be very few happy heterosexuals. Techniques have been developed that might enable you to change if you really want to.

17. Have you considered trying aversion therapy?

8 comments:

  1. Or here's another good one:
    How can troops keep up their morale knowing one of their leaders of the opposite sex is a heterosexual? Don't you feel it would be demoralizing if they were to coerce or force you into sexual acts as your superior, or if they were to stare at you in or out of uniform?

    ReplyDelete
  2. This, as well as the previous comment, reminds me of an editorial I read back in the 80s, entitled "Straights in the Military": http://ylatis.com/darkon/humor/gay_army.html

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  3. Buut straight people are normal.

    That's like asking people why they are not midgets.

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  4. Mika - can I have permission to use the photo of the 3 young people holding the posters?

    Carm De Santis

    ReplyDelete
  5. Yes, it is under fair use. Cheers!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Ok this survey seems much more stupid every time I read it. Physiologically, penises do not fit penises and vaginas don't fit vaginas. I am sick of this stupidity. This does not put me in perspective of a gay person because it is entirely idiotic. "why do you like to stick your penis in a vagina?" well ya, know, it is how procreation works! So please, don't post this on your myspace, facebook, twitter or what ever other social forum you believe anyone will listen to... It just makes you look like an idiot (which you probably are if you buy into the social media data farming experiment)

    ReplyDelete
  7. Dear Anonymous of 6/17/2011,
    Have you ever masturbated? Had a blowjob?

    ReplyDelete

Enjoy yourself, it's later than you think