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Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Terrifying Toy

Ladies and gents , I introduce you to the Eden Tropical G-Spot Vibrator .

Now , I'm not a huge fan of wackysex toy action myself . I prefer the more organic route when it comes to action in the bedroom , bathroom , or kitchen . I'm not a puritan by any stretch , but my lil lady bits just don't groove with the whole 50- horsepower fruit juicer kind of apparatus .

This thing is just fuckin SCARY . There is NO way in HELL you could ply me with ENOUGH narcotics to permit this battery-powered injustice to enter the confines of my undies , let alone my house! I mean , I couldn't even use this on someone else without laughing my face off , and I'm pretty sure that this is NOT the response hungry mamas are looking for .

This thing looks like it is capable of neutralizing an ARMY of Cyborgs!!!

Cue the attack of the killer silicone!

If I wanted something to lauch a life-changing attack on my netherregions I would ply a room full of horny biker dykes with a barrel of Jack Daniels and an ounce of meth and let the games begin!!!

Keep this fuckin thing and it's relations away from me ...

...or I might ....


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